Two local designers come together in a candid conversation about their passion and the balancing act of fashion, business and motherhood.
SHOT ON LOCATION AT CASSEY GAN’S SHOWROOM AND STUDIO. PHOTOGRAPHED BY LILY ALLISSA. TEXT BY AININA HASNUL.
I sit across from Nelissa Hilman and Cassey Gan, each wearing the other’s design. Nelissa dressed in Cassey Gan’s latest collection, flaunting the colourful plaid Jasmine Midi Dress. Meanwhile, Cassey is adorned in Nelissa Hilman’s black Drawstring Trench Cotton Dress, accentuated by NH Fisherman Cage Sandals with a hint of green.
As I watch, the two friends gently button up each other’s dresses. Despite their distinct looks, standing side by side, they appear almost identical, perhaps due to the similar haircut. Their similarities and differences coexist beautifully. Allowing them to connect yet still learn from unique differences, with each person bringing something to the table.
Both Nelissa and Cassey started far from a fashion background, having graduated as engineers. “I fondly remember you for that because there aren’t many engineers in the creative industry,” Nelissa remarked to Cassey during our conversation. Additionally, they’re of the same age and possess the same supermom power, effortlessly juggling the roles of mother, fashion designer, and business owner.
So how did they arrive here today, in an interview with BAZAAR, discussing the twists and turns of fashion? What gives them the strength to juggle all their roles? And what is it like behind the scenes? That’s what we aim to uncover today. Throughout this interview, you’ll find striking parallels between these two artists despite their niche products.
Nelissa Hilman
Former chemical engineer Nelissa Hilman learned everything she knew about shoemaking at the POLIMODA Fashion Institute in Florence, Italy. She launched her footwear label in 2012, after much experience in the shoe-making industry.
As her brand marks its 12th year in the industry, Nelissa continues to produce high-quality shoes and expands into ready-to-wear in 2022. She’s intentionally with her brand, stating, “It’s easy to copy and sell for money, but you want your own creative silhouette.” Committed to avoiding fast fashion practices, Nelissa Hilman produces in small quantities and only reproduces exceptional designs to minimise post-production waste.
Cassey Gan
Then we have Cassey. Like Nelissa, Cassey Gan felt something was missing when she studied engineering. So, she took a leap of faith and ventured into fashion, now her greatest passion. Graduating in Fashion Design & Technology: Womenswear from the London College of Fashion, Cassey credits her lecturers for shaping her into the designer she is today.
Known for her quirky and fun prints, Cassey’s designs are heavy on patterns and colours, turning her clothes into canvases filled with imagination and dreams. “The idea is always to bring joy to people through what we do,” she told BAZAAR. She had recently celebrated her 10th year in the industry and aims to solidify her brand beyond just fashion, envisioning it as a print-focused company.
Join the conversation between these two designers as they discuss their passion and the strength needed to persevere while balancing their creative pursuits and family roles.
In Conversation with Nelissa Hilman & Cassey Gan
Cassey Gan (CG): How do you balance motherhood and business?
Nelissa Hilman (NH): It’s never a perfect balance; it’s always shifting. Some days, work takes up 90%, and kids get 10%. Other days, the kids get 100% and work gets 0%. My team helps a lot, and I’m thankful for Nana and Hanif, who have been with me since 2015. We have a small team of four in the office and three in the shop, which makes management easier. Maintaining momentum while having a family is a challenge, but I’ve learned not to get too down during the lows because they always pass.
CG: I’m more relaxed about it now. I think it’s an age thing. Despite being tired, I’m at a happy stage in my life. It’s surprising how I can still function without much sleep. We’ve been through a lot, and now we pick our battles.
NH: Women designers truly inspire me, especially those in their 70s who are still going strong. I’m currently pursuing my Master’s in design and technology, and one day, I hope to teach and give back with the knowledge I’ve gained.
NH: What’s been the biggest surprise about motherhood?
CG: I didn’t expect to discover how high my tolerance level could be. It’s challenging not to get frustrated, but I find I can handle a lot from my child. He pushes me, but I manage. I see parallels between raising kids and managing my brand—they’re both exhausting yet incredibly rewarding.
NH: I resonate with that. Fulfilling and exhausting sums it up well. Would I change anything? No.
BAZAAR: Has becoming a mother significantly changed your designs?
CG: Absolutely. My customers have noticed a shift towards happier colours since I had kids. I used to avoid pink entirely, but after having my first child, it became a prominent colour in my designs. When my daughter arrived, even more pink! Customers comment that my prints have become more playful and childlike, so motherhood definitely influences my work.
NH: For me, it’s taken on a more “aunt-like” vibe. There are more flats now too! I used to focus on higher heels, but now I prioritise supportive and stylish flats. I’ve realised the importance of comfort while staying fashionable. I think our brand is settling into this phase—we’re not too young, not too old. We’re the cool aunties.
CG: That’s it—your new tagline, the cool aunties!
NH: Or the cool “mak-mak,” haha!
NH: What inspired your latest collection?
CG: This is my 10th anniversary collection, celebrating the Cassey Gan community and our supportive clients. In Malaysia, we bond over food, so I drew inspiration from our favourite dishes—pasta, truffle fries, and beyond Malaysian cuisine. We launched it just two weeks ago with 58 items and around 30 looks, each piece named after our customers and tailored to their preferences. Those names not included in this collection will be featured in our Chinese New Year capsule.
NH: Are you already working on your Chinese series?
CG: Yes, we’ve designed more pieces to split into two collections, launching at the end of October due to our made-to-order process. It’ll be a smaller capsule of around eight looks
NH: Can customers customise materials or designs?
CG: They can select colours but not fully customise designs, except for minor alterations.
NH: If you could rewind the clock, what would you do differently?
CG: Honestly, I wouldn’t change my journey. I experimented with everything when I started—trade shows, London Fashion Week, and more. Those experiences shaped what works best for my brand and personality. I’m content with my business model and scale now. Studying engineering first was crucial; it provided clarity about my path. I’m grateful for the opportunity to pursue my passion. Engineering was a job; fashion is my love.
BAZAAR: What was it like transitioning from engineering to fashion?
CG: For me, it was a challenge. I focused on science throughout high school and had no background in art or drawing. However, in fashion, I discovered a passion for the creative process of making garments. Initially, my lecturers described me as too ‘in the box.’ It took about half a year for me to begin thinking outside the box.
I used to only work with black and white. However, one of my lecturers recognized potential in my doodles and encouraged me to explore prints and colours. This completely shifted my perspective, and I am immensely grateful for that guidance.
NH: Not far from yours, I find joy in the process. I spent five years in corporate, immersed in computers—no design, no art. I couldn’t draw at all. When I discovered a shoemaking course in Florence, it was meant as a foundation for a master’s program.
My sketching teacher there was incredibly strict. I struggled to draw a shoe, and I vividly remember a classmate next to me getting scolded, with the teacher quipping, “What do you think you are, Michelangelo?” We were nearly in tears from the pressure. I wasn’t even fashionable in my twenties, which saved me quite a bit of money, haha. Compared to today’s Gen Z, who have access to the latest bags and makeup, I would have been broke!
Upon my return, I began working with a shoe factory, assisting a family friend with her artworks and galleries. This introduced me to Malaysian arts, my first steps into fashion before fully diving into shoes. Around 2013 or 2014, Vivy noticed one of the sample shoes I made and asked, “Nel, would you like to join Fashion Valet?” I enthusiastically said, “Yes,” as Vivy had just started around the same time. Meanwhile, I was still earning a minimum wage of RM900 at the shoe factory. With some savings and a loan, I decided to take the leap.
My mom’s wardrobe became my reference. I enjoyed crafting shoes—learning from scratch, drawing, cutting, and solving problems along the way. Adjusting tools, experimenting with materials and trends—it was all learned through trial and error. Shoe lines have a foundational structure; you tweak the upper, materials, and design. Clothing, in contrast, offers countless degrees of freedom—different fabrics, cuts, lengths, and styles.
CG: How was the experience from running a shoe business to clothing?
NH: Learning how clothes were made was new. We understood what materials people liked and what they didn’t. And we decided not to focus on big events like KLFW but to do more intimate in-store events. We might expand into bags too. You make bags, right?
CG: My bags are always just to complement the clothes. So the main thing is still clothes.In fact, I aim to incorporate my prints everywhere, extending beyond just clothing.
NH: I think even after experimenting with clothing, customers still primarily perceive Nelissa Hilman as a shoe brand. Shifting that perception is challenging and requires a lot of effort, but we’re committed to it. Moving forward, we’ll create clothes that my team and I would wear—nothing too unconventional, all ready-to-wear. An investor once told me, “Focus is beautiful. Look at Manolo, known for shoes.”
CG: One thing I’ve come to realise about my brand is the importance of not chasing trends. Our focus has always been on print blocking and seasonal inspiration rather than following trends. Our customers appreciate our unique style, so we strive to consistently deliver what inspires us. I intend to maintain this niche approach for as long as possible.
NH: What are your thoughts on the current fashion landscape in Malaysia compared to years ago?
CG: I’ve noticed there’s a surge in individualistic designs lately. Designers like Ghost Boy and Behati have developed distinct styles that are unmistakably theirs. Their courage is admirable. However, there’s less of a collective energy; it’s more about pockets of individuals pursuing their own paths.
NH: Do you consider KLFW a collective platform? What about the Malaysian Official Designers’ Association (MODA)?
CG: Yes, but I question how beneficial they truly are for designers. It’s not just about exposure; we need platforms that drive actual sales and provide financial support. I’m uncertain if these platforms effectively fulfil those needs for designers.
NL: When I first started, it was a struggle because I initially thought I had enough personal funding. Commercial banks are reluctant to take risks with fashion. I’m not sure about the funding landscape now though. It has been said that fashion is a high-risk business.
CG: Now that we’re doing it, we know it’s not an easy business.
NL: Especially because fashion changes throughout seasons. We’re learning a lot about social media for the business. Like you, I don’t love it, but I’m embracing it because it helps.
CG: I’m only on Instagram. It’s working for me, so I’ll stick with it for now. If I need to go on TikTok one day, I won’t say no. If it helps the business, I’ll do it.
NL: The energy is so different now. I enjoyed just making and designing clothes. Now, there’s so much more to do. It’s part of learning, I guess.
NH: What’s a trend you find baffling?
CG: Have you seen the pee stain jeans? It’s a pair by Jordan Luca and it sells for 800$. It’s everywhere on Instagram.
NH: For viral purposes? People do crazy things to go viral.
CG: Probably, but they’re selling well. This might be controversial but another thing I don’t understand is Balenciaga. I used to love their designs, but now I’m just confused. I hope I don’t offend anyone. Haha!
NH: What’s your favourite international brand?
CG: I’ve always admired Marni. They have a subtle yet powerful design sense that resonates with me. They were a major inspiration for me to pursue fashion. In 2011, I interned at Alexander McQueen, where I had the opportunity to work under Sarah Burton.
NH: Did you have to work late?
CG: Yes, every day until midnight.
NH: Did it pay well?
CG: No pay. A lot of people complain about that, but I was there for the experience. I didn’t mind because I was only there for three months. I just wanted to see how big fashion houses operate. Working there made me realise I wouldn’t want that kind of non-stop working environment when I’m a boss. It was 8 AM to 12 AM, Monday to Friday, with a half-hour break. Even on weekends, if they knew you were available, they’d call you in. It wasn’t very humane. So all the stories about working there are true. Regardless, it was a good experience.
CG: What local platforms helped the most with your business?
NH: It was Fashion Valet when I first started because Vivy blogged about the shoes, and her followers reacted to it. Then it was Zalora for a bit, but that wasn’t so encouraging. We had our first store in 2017 and a few pop-ups in Bangsar too. A lot of social media came in during the pandemic. Additionally, we did collaborations with artists, which definitely helped.
CG: For me, I can’t deny that KLFW put me on the fashion scene. After joining, quite a few magazines picked up my designs for shoots and loans. That really helped me get into the local fashion scene. I must say that when it first started, it really did help me in terms of exposure. In terms of selling, it’s the pop-ups. I found many clients there.
NH: Do you want to go back to KLFW again?
CG: No, I feel that the business model has evolved. I now enjoy having a small team. We handle everything in-house, allowing us to personally engage with and understand our customers better. I really appreciate keeping our operations small and intimate.
NH: There’s beauty in staying small.
CG: Exactly. I realised that my clothes are difficult to mass-produce. And I’ve tried, but the details and curves make it challenging for factories to achieve perfect workmanship and proportions. So, I decided not to compromise. It’s no shame being small. In fact, I enjoy it.
BAZAAR: If you were to recommend platforms for upcoming designers, what would be your advice?
NH: While multi-label stores were popular before, I believe having your own Instagram and social media presence is now a strong starting point. Pop-ups are still effective too. Any pop-up opportunity you come across, seize it.
I remember packing all my shoes into my Myvi—about 160 or 180 boxes. With platforms like TikTok, gaining traction has become easier. Youngsters today are so savvy with these tools.
CG: They just have to be creative about their content.
BAZAAR: What are your aspirations for the future of your brand?
CG: As I mentioned, I hope to continue this journey until I’m old and grey. I envision my brand not just as a fashion label but as a print-centric company. Prints have endless possibilities, and that’s what I aim to explore.
NH: For NH, our goal is to establish ourselves as the top Malaysian shoe brand. Clothing remains a complementary aspect. To excel in one area, shoes are our current focus. Eventually, we plan to venture into bags. However, creating our own distinctive silhouette, rather than imitating others, is key. It’s about balancing creativity with commercial viability. There’s so much I want to accomplish. I want to be in the industry for as long as I can but also want to retire. Or maybe teach. But first, I need to solidify the company.
Dive into our past designers’ interview here.
